Monday, 30 August 2010

Still no computer

Still sadly lacking a computer.

Was out for another driving lesson today, basically drove for the full lesson. Lots and lots of roundabouts. Ended up with sore arms which isn't fun, I'm not particularly finding a good way to sit yet.

Monday, 23 August 2010

A lovely Sunday day.

Was a weird sunny rainy day today. Which really isn't that weird at all for Scotland. Haven't been feeling particularly upbeat for a wee while, not sure if that's related to the medication decrease. Anyways started out in Stirling, had a lovely chicken mayo baguette which was nice. Bought some jeans which of course I don't believe in trying them on in the shops, got them home to try on to discover I could get them up but they were rather on the tight side and couldn't get my nether regions inside. So I'll have to send my mum back to return them.

After that went to watch a pub football team, made me want to play football. I'm too unfit but Christ the goalie was pretty shite, seemed to have a wheelie bin full of pies beside the goals. Then went to watch Man utd play Fulham. Was sitting in Sportsters in Falkirk when suddenly the frigging door shattered. No idea what happened but the police turned up and took away some CCTV footage. Falkirk Herald will be anticipated now. As for the match it ended Fulham 2 - Man Utd 2 but don't worry, yesterday Falkirk beat Stirling Albion 3-0.

Thursday, 19 August 2010

Computer problems again

Came back on Monday to find that my computer wouldn't turn on. For some reason it just sat there, flashing it's little green light at me. Not sure what happened whilst I was away but it's annoying.

Have been looking at computers for a few months, mainly for gaming but it's only wishful thinking at this current point in time. Slightly jealous of America at the moment, was looking up various sites and came across an American price comparison site Become.com . Has a lot of items for sale you can find on various sites including listings of Ebay, which is pretty damn useful. Would be great if there was a UK version available.

After looking at computers I took some time to look around the rest of the site. After spending time as a landscape gardener my eyes were drawn to various types of lawn mowers. Just look at Zero turn lawn mowers . If I was still doing lawns I'd love to have a ride on mower, which male wouldn't? Makes the job so much quicker and easier. I guess it's a lot of money but when you compare it to a normal push mower it'd take you less than a quarter of the time. Even when compared to a petrol mower you'd take half the time and do a neater more even job. You'd be able to do more gardens in the same length of time so eventually it'd pay for itself. Not all mowers are even that expensive Ariens lawn mower , it's not that much more than the price of a good petrol mower and would be a lot quicker.

I guess it all depends on the size of the gardens of grounds you're tackling. I had to work in a variety of gardens from large private ones to commercial ones and small home gardens. For commercial gardens and large private gardens where people except a certain level of finish you really need a good mower. I know from personal experience that certain types of mower such as petrol mowers used by local councils really don't work that well due to the small number of options you get for heights of the blades and since most councils are on a tight schedule they never adjust the heights from garden to garden. You end up with very patchy grass, sometimes even leaving bare soil and it just looks a complete mess. I think if I were doing it today I'd use Ariens lawn mower , it's relatively cheap and a good product that would allow you not to cut corners on workmanship at the expensive of time.

Wednesday, 11 August 2010

Oh yeah I remember why I made this blog in the first place.

Been quite a while since I actually discussed the subject that actually started this blog. So here's an update.

Was at the doctors today after 2 months, I usually see him once a month but he was on holiday, although I won't see him again for another 2 months. We had a quick discussion about how the world was treating me and about how I looked happier, talked about what I was doing with my time, jobs and the obligatory question on the psychiatrist that never seems to contact me. It's a long long long waiting list but that's like a year now and still no word to even say I'm on the list. Anyways after discussing it and my doctor saying that medication can't cure anxiety we decided to reduce the dosage of my fluoxetine. I don't mind since I have no idea if it was doing anything and I do feel somewhat better. Well I think I do. I know I'm a lot less anxious than I was thanks to going out into public more and I can only remember feeling nauseous once in public in the past few months and that was because I wasn't feeling well.

So anyways along with halving the dosage we discussed coming off it all together eventually. That's where I'm slightly apprehensive since there's a lot of stories and evidence pointing to that being the worst stage and much more prone to suicide than at any other stage. So that's something to look forward to. 

Overall I think I do feel better apart from my self loathing on the fact that I'm a fat git which in turn leads me to eating. That's something I'll have to cure myself.

Monday, 9 August 2010

On the road.

Today I left the confines of the Falkirk Wheel car park and headed out on to the open road. Firstly I had to navigate one roundabout and head up into Camelon and around another roundabout and back again. So far I'm not that good with roundabouts, doing a lot of over steering. After successfully not hitting anything I drove further around another two roundabouts into Bainsford, managed to stall the car once. Which was fun. I managed to keep the car on the right side of the road so that's an improvement and managed to go at a constant speed without juddering along, so already I'm a better driver than my mother.

Driving instructor thought I was good enough to drive home and even if I wasn't it's only people in Denny who were at risk so that's fine. Coming back from Falkirk managed to do 50mph, which is legal since it's a 60mph speed limit, was going fine until I came to Denny Cross. Traffic lights were at red so had to stop, once they turned to green a very very very very slow moving old man decided that he'd cross the road, right on the way I was heading, so I had to sit in the middle of the road like a twit waiting on him. Far too many witnesses at that time to do Saints Row style driving.


However slowly and surely I seem to be getting better at it.

If I did hit someone would that mean my car insurance premium would go even higher? Hmm

Oh my sister also passed me whilst driving, I never noticed her but she noticed me, she told me that I seemed to be doing fine. She of course didn't see me in Bainsford holding up the traffic after panicking. My anxiety still exists.

Saturday, 7 August 2010

Things to not read before bed

Yesterday my small friend Marti went to see Twilight Eclipse, poor guy, I've already suffered seen it so I know how bad overlyhyped it is. However with that being said there is a lot worse films out there... like Remember me. Now that film is bum numbingly dull, I had to suppress laughter when standing in the queue in HMV with the people in front talking about how great the film is but how sad the ending is, they cried all night apparently. I had cried quite a bit during it too but for vastly different reasons. Sadly I know some Robert Pattinson fans, who are slightly crazy and will kill me if I dare say anything bad about him.

However as bad as Remember me is, there's worse, there's Wicker Park. I had to sit through that for a friends birthday, being the only questionably straight male at it I was vastly outnumbered in the film choice. By the end of the film my posterior was so numb that I was at genuine risk of being someones piece of pie without even noticing. If you ever want to torture someone, force them to watch Wicker Park. Seriously.

Now those are films that are in the past, there's one in the near future that gives me nightmares by only reading the synopsis. The human centipede. I hate horrors. I hate the Saw franchise. I hate the idea of Hostel but they sound to me like Mary Poppins compared to this film. I shall be taking my axe to bed to protect me.



Speaking of nightmares, I've come to realise that in the not too distant future I'm going to be requiring car insurance. I have no real idea about how much car insurance costs but it must be a decent business for car insurance companies to horrify us daily with a man yelling " Go Compare" . I'd much rather do business with a talking soviet meerkat. Come to think of it car insurance adverts are pretty damn surreal. You have a bulldog who can talk, a telephone and computer mouse that speed around on set and can talk but have no eyes or mouth, a meerkat in a smokers jacket living in a stately home who speaks with a Russian accent, a group of weirdos from the public, a scary tenor and an Admiral who's selling car insurance rather than boat insurance. Think there's an elephant somewhere too, not like in general since there's quite a few elephants dotted around but like Elephant car insurance or something along those lines.

Not sure where my train of thought was going but I did learn that the car of my dreams, the Mitsubishi L200 would be too expensive for me to insure. Sad I know.

Tuesday, 3 August 2010

So you're not supposed to brake that hard?

Had my second driving lesson yesterday, I think it went okay but to be honest I'm not really getting the hang of it. For example the push-pull system of the wheel is a concept I just can't grasp, I keep trying to turn the wheel 360degrees without moving my hands out of position. Sooner or later I think I'll realise my arms can't go through each other.

I can't seem to change gear without looking at the gear stick, it's not very helpful to take your eyes off of the road.

This time I had to drive to different car parks and around roundabouts. Again steering is an issue, I either forget to steer or try to steer too much. Go around a roundabout you're supposed to keep you hands in one position, I kept moving mine and kept turning. I also managed to go 40mph in a 30 mph zone, whoops. I struggle with the concept of light touches to the accelerator and when she says brake I BRAKE, full foot on the brake in a move that could decapitate or result in a lovely windshield cannon move.



The Falkirk wheel is quite a popular tourist attraction so you there are other cars on the roads near it, often the people are from other countries so you never know what they might drive like. Fortunately I too drive like I'm foreign, on the wrong side of the road. 

Next week I'll be out on the open road. Wooooooooooo.